Anniversaries and due dates can be some of the hardest days in the calendar for bereaved parents. The world around you may not acknowledge them, but for you, these dates carry enormous weight — a reminder of who was lost, and of the life that might have been.
There is no right or wrong way to mark these days. Some families want to do something meaningful; others simply need to get through. Whatever you choose, your feelings are valid and your baby deserves to be remembered.
Here are some gentle ideas that other bereaved families have found helpful.
Light a Candle
One of the simplest and most widely used acts of remembrance is lighting a candle. It requires nothing more than a quiet moment and a flame — yet it can feel profoundly meaningful. Many families light a candle at a specific time on their baby's anniversary or due date, sometimes alongside others who are also remembering.
On 15th October each year — Baby Loss Awareness Day — thousands of families around the world take part in the Wave of Light, lighting candles at 7pm local time to create a continuous wave of light across time zones in memory of all babies lost.
Visit a Special Place
Some families have a place that feels connected to their baby — a garden, a park, a beach, or a place of worship. Visiting on an anniversary can be a way of marking the day with intention, of stepping away from the ordinary and giving yourself permission to grieve and remember.
Plant Something Living
A tree, a rose bush, or a pot of flowers planted in your baby's memory can become a living tribute that grows and changes with the seasons. Returning to it each year on an anniversary can become a gentle, grounding ritual.
Write to Your Baby
Many bereaved parents find comfort in writing — a letter, a poem, or simply a few words addressed to their baby. It doesn't need to be shared with anyone. It is simply a way of speaking to your baby, of telling them what you wish you could say.
Do Something in Their Honour
Some families mark anniversaries by doing something kind or meaningful in their baby's name — donating to a charity like Sands or Tommy's, volunteering, or simply performing a small act of kindness. It can feel like a way of sending love out into the world on behalf of your baby.
Gather With Those Who Remember
If there are others in your life who knew about your baby — a partner, a parent, a close friend — marking the day together can be a comfort. Simply saying your baby's name aloud, sharing a memory, or sitting together in quiet acknowledgement can mean a great deal.
Create or Return to a Memorial Keepsake
For many families, a physical keepsake becomes especially important on anniversaries and due dates — something to hold, to look at, to feel close to. Our handcrafted baby loss hearts are chosen by families as a lasting memorial, each containing a tiny baby figure shaped to reflect their baby's gestation week.
Some families order a heart specifically to mark an anniversary — a first anniversary, a milestone birthday, or Baby Loss Awareness Week. Others gift one to a grandparent or friend who is also grieving, so that the memory is shared and held by more than one person.
Browse our 8–11 Week Baby Loss Heart, our 6–7 Week Baby Loss Heart, or our full range to find the heart that feels right for your baby.
Give Yourself Permission to Feel Whatever You Feel
Anniversaries can bring up a complex mix of emotions — grief, love, anger, gratitude, numbness, or all of these at once. There is no correct way to feel. Be gentle with yourself on these days. You are carrying something profound.
If you find anniversaries particularly difficult, organisations like Sands and the Miscarriage Association offer helplines and support specifically for bereaved parents.
Your baby is remembered — today, and every day.